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1992-09-02
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LI love Gudesensÿ
LKonditori on TV2...ÿ
L2Written by Tyrant/CADAVERÿ
-Jesusð
knockedð
onð
theð
door,ð
heð
said:ð
I
wantðtoðbeðaðpartð
ofð
yourð
life!ð
Ið
want
toðleadðyouðthroughðtheðlight.ð-This
wasð
theð
firstð
timeð Jesusð becameð að part
ofðmyðlife.ð-ðJesusðisðwalkingðfrom
doorð
toð
door.ð
-ð
Jesusð isð thereð forð you
too!ðLetðusðprayðtogetherðandðpraise
ourð lordsð name,ð Jesusð weðloveðyou,ðyou
loveðus...
Oooooaawh-noooo!ðStop!ðWhatðisðthis
shit?ðYeah,ðitðsureðlooksðlikeðsome
christianðmumbo-jumboðtoðme!ð
-Whatð
has
causedðmeðtoðwriteðsuchðstuff?
L1SThe explanation;ÿ
-ActuallyðIðwasðrewindingðað
Deathð
Metal
tapeðtoðtheðstart,ðwhenðthisðbright
ideaðstruckðmyðmind...ðIðwantedðtoðdo
somethingðdifferent,ðshouldðIðdoðit?
CouldðIðdoðit?ðYes-yes,ð
Ið
wasð
goingð
to
doðit...ðWhat?ðWHAT?ðWHAT?ð-Yeah,ðI
wasðgoingðtoðlistenðtoðthe,,,ðradio!
-Ifðyouðhadðknownðmeðbyðpersonðthenðyou
wouldðknowð
howð
unlikelyð
með
thisð
was!
Anyway,ðIðstartedðgoingðthrough
severalðchannelsðonðtheðradioð
andð
then
Iðfoundðthisðchannelðwhichðbroadcasted
thisðchristianðshit-program!ðThat's
whereðIðgotðtheðstarting-textðfrom.
-Soðthereðwasðnothingðfuckingðscary
aboutðthis.ðI'mðnotðbecomingða
christianðdudeðorðanythingðlikeðthat,
justðrelax!
However,ðthisðradio-programðreminded
meðaboutðthisðprogramðwhichðTV2
broadcastðeveryðmodda-fuckin'ðsunday!
(It'sðhavingðaðsummerhollidayðright
now,ðthough!)ð-Guessðthatðmany
norwegiansðareðscreamingðtheðnameðof
theðprogramðinðdispear...ð"Gudesens
konditorið-Søndagsåpent"ðYep,ðthat's
theðnameðalright!ðLet'sðopenða
discussionð
aboutð
thisð
program!
L1SGudesens Konditori -Sondagsaapentÿ
Itðstartsðwithðthisðdudeðenteringðthe
screen...ðHeðhasðaðbeardðandðhe's
constantlyðsmiling...ðIðguessðyouðhate
himðalready!ð-ðThenðheðstarts
presentingðtodaysðissue...ðIt'sðalways
aboutðsomethingðterrible,ðorðatðleast
aboutðsomebodyðthatðhaveðbeen
experiencingð"orð!doingð!something
terribleð-Butðwithð
theð
guidanceð
ofð
God,
Jesusð
orð
whatever,ð
theyð
haveð
nowð seen
theðlight!ð-ðAllðtheðissuesðpresented
haveðthisðlastðthingðinðcommon,ðthe
Christendomðhasðalwaysðsavedðthem
somehow!ðGrrrrrargh!
Thisðprogramðhasðallðtheðdistinctive
stampsðofðChristendom,ðespeciallyðthe
onesðthatðmakeðmeðgoðberserk!ðThe
unrealð'kindness!ð'Theð&horrible
christianðmusicðlikeðSputnikðandðall
thoseðotherðSalvationðArmy-bands...
-Theð
kindað
musicð
whichð
makesð
theð crowd
ofðoldðpeopleðgoðextaticðandðsingðof
joy...ðTheðlyricsðareðalwaysðvery
inspiring,ðandðtheyðareðALWAYSðabout
Jesus!ðIðfindðitðQuiteðincredibleðthat
thereðhaveðbeenðmadeðsoðmanyðsongs
dedicatedðtoðaðpersonðwhichðneverðhas
existed...ð*:)ð-ðAndðanotherðthing
whichð
youð
canð
writeð
10ð
000ð
timesð
atð the
wall,ðisðthatðtheðprogramðisðdefinately
goingðtoðendðwithðsomeðfuckingðwise
wordsðfromðtheðbible.ð(ARrrgh!)
L1SWhy don't I belive in god?ÿ
AllðtheðchristianðpeopleðI'veðdiscussed
theðmatterðofðlifeðandðdeath,ðGodðand
allðthoseðunansweredðquestionsð(Which
probablyðwillðstayðunansweredðforðall
eternityð*=)ðaskðmeðwhyðI'mðnotða
religiousðperson,ðandðmoreðimportant,
whyðIðdon'tðbeliveðinðGod,ðJesusðthe
bibleð(andðit'sðfairytales...ð*=)ð-I
sayðthatðIðmightðbeðtooðmuchðofða
realist;ðIðjustðhaveðaðveryðhardðtime
believingðsomethingðthatðIðcan'tðsee
andðsomethingðwhichðIðfindðstupidðand
unlogical.ð-ðButðthereðareðalsoðsome
otherðreasonsðwhyðchristianityðreally
annoysðme!ðIt's...
L1SThe god blessing fucking kindness!ÿ
Iðjustðcan'tðstandðallðthoseðthat
"believe-that-they-are-saints."ð)Those
whoðareðwalkingðaround,ðthinkingðthat
theyðareðlivingðaðlifeðwhichðisð
soð
much
moreðworthðthanðother's.ð-Cozð"they
haveðfoundðtheðmeaningðofðtheðlife!"
-Eatð
myð
donutð ifð theyð have!
Theseð
kindsð ofð peopleð canð makeð með go
crazy!ðYouðcanðhearðwhoðtheyðareðas
soonð asð theyð openð theirð mouth,ð cozð they
areð
alwaysð
talkingð
withð
að veryð calmð and
niceðvoice,ðtheyðareðalwaysðsmiling
withðbothðtheirðeyesðandðtheirðmouth
whichðconstantlyðfillðtheðairðwith
pollutedð"christianity-talk.ð!Ið!hate
you,ð abhorðyou,ðdetestðyou,ðloatheðyou,
Youðfuckingðdisgustingðabominable
creatures!ð-Youðareðsoðfalse,ðit's
impossibleðtoðknowðwetherðyouðtalkðthe
truthðorðifðyouðareðlying!ð-Andðthe
worstðthingðisðthatðyouðdon'tðknow
yourself,ðcozð
youð
thinkð
thatð
youð
areð
a
fuckingðsaint,ðanðangelðsendðbyðyour
"god".
L1SMe, a Satanist?ÿ
Myðhighestðgoalðisn'tðtoðdieðaðdeath
whichðisðupmostðextremeðpainfull.ðI'm
notðcuttingðpentagramsðinðmyðwristð
with
slaughter-knifes.ðIðdon'tðwantðall
christiansðtoðperishðandðroth!ðIðdon't
usuallyðburnð
churchesð
inð
hollidays,ð
and
I'mðnoðfuckingðSatan-child!ð-ðBut
still,ðIðhateðaðlotðofðthingsðwithðthe
soðcalledðchristendom!ðOfðcourse,ðthe
christendomðisðnotðallðbad.ðIt'sðof
courseðimportantðthatðweðfocusðonðthe
goodðthingsðinðlifeðandðnotðonlyðthe
badðthingsð(cruelty,ðdeath,ðcorruption
aso.),ðbutðIðthinkðthatðtheðfalse
"nice"ðchristiansðruinðtheðentire
religion.ð-Theyðareðallðsoðnaive,ðand
haveðstupidðanswersðforðeverything...
Askðaðchristianðanðanswerðthatðit's
impossibleðforðhimðtoðaskðandð
heð
says:
"Godðdon'tðwantðusðtoðunderstandðall"
Fuck!ðIðcan'tðunderstandðhowðthis
lowlifeðreligionðhasðsurvivedðforðso
manyðthousandsðofðyears.ðAreðweðnot
becomingðcivilizedðenoughðtoðremoveð
our
beliefsðfromðsuchðstupidðreligionsðas
christendom!ð-It'sðjustðaðbookðwritten
andð
inventedð
byð humans,ð andð that'sð all!
It'sðjustðaðbookðwhereðpeopleðhave
collectedð+storiesð*whichð*were
representableð
forð
theð
moralsð
andð
norms
ofðthatðtime;ðButðareð
weð
notð
devoloping
soðfastðthatðtheseð
normsð
soonð
haveð
to
beðchanged?ð-ðTheðtenðcommitmentsð
are
basicðrulesðwhichðweðcanðseeðtodayðin
theðlawsðofðourðcountry,ðbutðallðthat
otherð bullð reallyð makesð með goð angryðand
looseðallðcontrol!ð-Thereðisðnoðgod,
it'sðasðsimpleðasðthat!
L1SWhat about you?ÿ
Oki,ðIðguessðthatðIðcouldðhaveðwritten
anðentireðbookðaboutðthisðsubject.
(Christendom,ðtheðchristianð
programsð
at
TVðandðRadioðaso.)ðButðIðwon't!ð(At
leastðnotðnow!)ðNo,ðquiteðtheðoposite.
CozðIðwillðactuallyðendðthisðarticle
rightðhere!ðYeah,ðIðknowðthatðthe
articleðseemsðveryðunstructuredðaso.
ifðIðendðitðhere,ðbutðsoðwhat?ðThis
articleð
wasð
onlyð
meantð
asð
anð
improvised
brainstorming-article.ðThereðshouldn't
reallyð
beð að deepð cuttingð messageð behind
it,ðbutðstill,ðIðguessðthatðthis
articleðwillðperhapsðopenðforðaðrather
interrestingðdiscussionðinðourðscene.
Soð#writeð#yourð"opinionð"about
Christianity,ðSatanism,ðotherðfanatic
religionsðandðallðthatðbull!ðAnd
remember;ðBeðAGGRESSIVE!